Half-Time Report: The Coolest Things I’ve Done So Far This Summer…

1. Published my novel, which you should be reading right now, unless you’ve already finished it, in which case you should be telling EVERYONE you come into contact with that they will burn in Hell if they don’t read it, but if you haven’t purchased it yet, click HERE.

Crimes of Fashion Cover

2. Picnicked by the lake and then lit a lantern in my father’s memory at Forest Hills Cemetery’s annual Lantern Festival.1010946_10151515705774220_390234874_n

3. Moderated a Q&A with Dermot Mulroney at the Cape Rep Theater. He’s still as hot as he was in “My Best Friend’s Wedding,” his wife’s a hot shit, PLUS they put me up in a swanky room at Ocean Edge, with a bottle of bubbly as thanks.


4. Had the pleasure, by chance, of introducing two of the best actors of this (or any other) generation: Oscar-winner Chris Cooper and three-time Emmy-winner Tony Shalhoub (whom I was surprised had never worked together, let alone met).This is the first picture ever taken of them, and I will accept huge bunches of money for it, and both of them will forgive me if I do because they both look great.



5. Saw Sally Taylor (swaddled in fog) perform at The Summer House on Nantucket…which is weird, because we know each other from Martha’s Vineyard.IMG_8571

6. Bought this floating party island for the beach house.IMG_8840



7. Decided NOT to jump into the water in Maine…until maybe August.



8. Discovered St. Barth, where I was floating on my back off St. Jean Beach and actually fell asleep for a moment.


9. Spent a long weekend on a private island off Cape Cod with some very wild and crazy friends (as well as the ghost of a 19th-century slave who knew the owner of the house was adamantly opposed to slavery and also knew that he’d never be free).



10. Fell in love with Crested Butte, CO, where we went horseback riding up a valley called Oh Be Joyful, 4-wheeling to a place called the Devil’s Punchbowl, and drove through the world’s largest stand of Aspen trees (which makes it the world’s second-largest living organism).



11. Went to a party on the Iriquois, a mega-yacht I’ve been dying to get onto since its owner, John Henry, bought the Red Sox.



12. On Zack’s Beach on Martha’s Vineyard, recreated a photo taken 30 years ago with one of my best friends. (The original was taken on her grandmother’s dock in Marion, MA)



13. Found copies of the grandmother in question, Thalassa Cruso’s, old TV show, “Making Things Grow” online


14. Had a picnic on the Dogfish Bar


15. Went to a party at Blue Heron Farm without realizing that the famous architect Sir Norman Foster had bought it and that’s why they didn’t want people taking pictures of the super cool new pool house (which I embarrassingly speculated was designed by Philip Johnson)



…But undoubtedly the best was…


Sitting on the deck in Martha’s Vineyard, holding Sam’s hand while watching a lightning storm travel North along the mainland and discussing growing old together.

Sorry. I was too busy watching the storm to take a picture of it, but here’s the sunset to make up for it:



So far, August doesn’t suck, either.

2013’s Best Beach Read!

11673300_Cover Proof-7.4137877,jpeg
Desiree Grabowski is an unscrupulous, social-climbing parasite, married to one of New York’s richest lawyers. At the hair salon, she meets the mysterious Alta Monte di’Soldi, an Italian countess with a shadowy past. Meanwhile, Desiree’s Central American housekeeper, Ita, lives in abject terror of being deported but demonstrates a genius for fashion design that catches the countess’ eye. What follows is a rip-snorting romp, a ribald and racy page-turner reminiscent of the very best (or worst) of the genre.
Crimes of Fashion…Three Women. One Fashion Empire. Six Claws.
Order the paperback today by clicking here (Kindle and e-reader versions available by mid-July)

I’m Your Uncle Mame!


There’s an old saying: Children are like farts—you only enjoy your own. I happen to disagree, partly because I don’t have any children of my own, but mostly because it’s great fun being a guncle (gay uncle). read more